You Think Your Child Needs Therapy, But Your Ex Doesn’t—Now What?

You’ve noticed your child becoming withdrawn, refusing to go to school, or losing interest in their favorite activities. You think therapy could help, but your ex refuses to allow it. One of the hardest parts of co-parenting is when it feels like your co-parent isn’t acting in your child’s best interests. If you and your ex cannot agree on whether your child needs therapy, it may be time to bring in a child custody attorney in California.

At the Law Office of Taylor B. Warner, APLC, we are passionate about helping clients work through stressful family law issues. Attorney Taylor Warner is a California Bar Certified Family Law Specialist who works to find customized solutions for her clients’ wide range of needs. Call our child custody law firm at 909-466-5575 to schedule a consultation now.

Who Has the Right to Determine Whether a Child Goes to Therapy?

In California, there’s a distinction between legal custody and physical custody. Physical custody determines where a child lives and how their time is spent. Legal custody specifies who has the right to make important decisions about a child’s health, education, and welfare—and that includes psychological counseling and other forms of mental health treatment.

If one parent has sole legal custody, they generally get to make these decisions without input from the other parent. However, it does depend on what’s in your custody order, so you may want to revisit it with your child custody lawyer.

It’s fairly common for both parents to share joint legal custody, even if the child primarily lives with one parent. In these cases, it’s more complicated when parents disagree.

Joint legal custody doesn’t necessarily mean that both parents have to agree on every decision. When the court issues a joint legal custody order, that order must specify when both parents’ consent is required. If there’s an area where mutual consent is not required, either parent may generally make a decision, as long as their actions are consistent with the custody order.

Some custody orders require both parents to consent to starting or stopping mental health treatment. Others give one parent that responsibility.

What You Can Do If Your Ex Refuses Therapy

If your ex refuses to allow your child to go to therapy, there are some things you can do to lay the groundwork for eventually bringing the issue to court. Ensure that you work with your child custody attorney throughout this process to document your concerns properly and protect your child’s best interests.

First, you may want to document the specific concerns that led you to seek therapy in the first place. Consider documenting:

• Changes in your child’s sleeping and eating habits
• Increased anxiety, sadness, or withdrawal
• Behavioral difficulties at school or during activities
• Statements your child makes about their emotional well-being
• Recommendations from teachers, pediatricians, and other professionals

Your pediatrician may evaluate your concerns and recommend a mental health professional. A recommendation from someone other than you may carry weight when it comes to negotiating with your co-parent or asking the court to step in.

If you think the matter is just a misunderstanding, mediation may be helpful. It’s generally faster and less expensive than litigation, and it may help you and your co-parent communicate your concerns in a way that allows you to come to an agreement.

Can a California Court Order Therapy?

If informal negotiations and mediation are unsuccessful, litigation may be your only option. In some cases, the courts will modify custody orders as needed to allow the child to get the care they need. Courts consider all factors related to the child’s best interests. Depending on the situation, your child custody lawyer may ask the court to authorize a specific treatment, clarify an existing order, or allow you to make certain healthcare decisions alone.

Your Options When Your Child Needs Immediate Mental Health Help

When your child is facing an emergency mental health situation, it’s a completely different situation than a disagreement about routine counseling. If your child is a danger to themselves or others, you should seek immediate help through crisis services or 911. You can work with your attorney to seek an emergency custody order allowing necessary treatment or explore your other options.

Contact Our California Child Custody Law Firm Today

If you worry about your child’s mental health needs not being met, it may be time to talk to a lawyer about your next steps. We’re here to help. Give us a call at 909-466-5575 or contact us online.

Taylor Warner

Taylor has always been an advocate. Growing up the middle child with an older and a younger brother, Taylor developed a strong voice and personality and has always felt strongly about helping others. Becoming a lawyer seemed to fit Taylor’s personality and character – she is a strong leader and a bold advocate. Learn more here.